time passages

so i missed the day... actually, missed a lot of days, but this day i reference, the first of may, is especially missed... as is the music, which is so much a part of the first of may... the music is so far away sometimes from the daily life and the people in it... the memories way much farther away (don't be sad, cuz two out of three ain't bad, ya know?)... many years since anything deeply (as in truly madly and beyond) meaningful has been shared or created, alas... so i mourn a bit and at least stop by a couple of hours after the fact to acknowledge when i was small... and how we used to laugh while others used to play... because even if you never really knew that experience or knew me well enough to understand how much that concept and experience meant to me (from the library corner through the leap off the precipice and the beginning of the end marked by tape 62 and the selected rest {72, 85, 95, and so on through 305, 351, 365-9 [or was that 165-9, alas, memories fade], and more, 387, 390, 391... sigh} that followed)... oh (as in oh wow) the music was so much of me outside of this blogging life...

wow, that was an unexpected aside...

miss me?

i do...

besides the music

like the latest or the oldest or those in between, musical journeys (and videos too) have always been a heavy influence on life as i know it... but besides the music, there are a lot of things you would want to know me before you decide whether to really want to know me (and i don't necessarily mean in the biblical sense, as in sex {and they say the bible is not porn, but where is is knowing given a sexual connotation, aye?}, but rather in any sense deeper than hello how are your what's new and so on)... you still here? :)

one thing you should know is that i have imaginary best friends and also celebrity best friends, some i've actually met and they will remain nameless due to respect for privacy and some i only know from reading/listening to almost every word they've said or sung or written and they speak from my mind so often that their writings and ramblings (statements, opinions, beliefs, and so on) are close enough to mine (high probability) so you can use them as a barometer to gauge whether we might be compatible beyond the superficial politeness of acquaintances and casual friends...

harry chapin would top the list... george carlin would probably be a solid second with john lennon a close third... they could easily be my representatives, if you follow the reasoning... there's a start for your reading list (head start, no doubt), i mean, if you really want to start to have some sort of conversation starter to actually (really) get to know me beyond the...

repetition :)

wide awake at 4am again

how many times will i write the same line
will i use the same rhyme
is it all the same crime

oh how many ways can i sum up the days
will i act the same plays
is it all the same maze

the wind blows no answers tonight
just the same old story board i write
how long since i first put down in pen
and i am wide awake at 4am again

i know i need to be in love
i know i've wasted too much time
i know i ask perfection from a quite imperfect world
and fool enough to think that's what i'll find

how many times will i sing the same song
will i right the same wrong
will i ever belong

how many times will i recall the scene
do you know what i mean
was it all a dream

so long ago

can you imagine what the world would be
like everyone lived honestly
can you imagine how your life would feel
if you let yourself just be real
all the time
all the time

oh my god i can't believe it's happening again


and again...


and again...


tbc...


:)

part of me

(not just a kim carnes song, or cover, for that matter), but the facts of life as i know them is that there are threads (and not just a carole king song, or tapestry, for that matter) weaving through life connecting moments and people and memories and promises and magic and poems and more (and prayers for some, or alliteration, even) and everything old is new again or something like that, but ever so seriously (like a brick to the forehead), i sensed she (a singer known as dia frampton) would touch the roots (the deepest threads of me, that is, and she did at first eye contact… but she was a child standing in the rain and i was an aging rocker even wetter staring at her smile in the midst of the warped tour a few years back) and her words (and music) and several times she blew through my mind (even more than stevi nicks once did, but there are not dozens of letters written to the fantasy of knowing her today cuz I’m older and wiser and more mature and realistic and stupid, or something like that) and finally, she did (you can also listen below, with one less thread) and maybe it means something to you too, but to truly know me (which is a prerequisite to being with me), you must understand this thread and to stay, you must accept it (the feeling, the promise, the dream, the magic, the one, the love, it stays with you if you let it) will always be a part of me for the threads of love never end (they just go on and on my friends, and not just a shari lewis song, or lambchop, even)…