lover

looking for a lover
a lover of words
a lover of childhood
innocence and birds
a lover of playfulness
a lover of songs
a lover of feelings
the weaks and the strongs

i’m looking for a lover
a lover of smiles
a lover of journeys
the learning and miles
a lover of peacefulness
a lover of love
a lover of senses
life and all those we dream of

love to share the word play
the language of emotions
the sharing of each other
betrayals and devotions
love to share the passion
of seeking truth or bust
love to share the dream
of unconditional trust

i wish you every night
i wish you every day
i wish you were here with me
in every single way
a lover of romance
a lover of the tears
a lover of intensity
overcoming fears
a lover of laughter
a lover of love
a lover of wonders
life and all those we dream of

i am looking for a lover
a heart that is true
i am looking for a lover
could it be you?

someone like you

is there anybody out there?
anybody alone?
anybody want a partner?
still secure on your own?
it’s not because you are needy
it’s not because you are weak
but because you love sharing
and it’s love that you seek

is there anybody out there?
anybody free?
not looking for a replacement
you know you are complete
it’s not because you are frightened
it’s not because you are empty
but because you love caring
and you’re looking for me

you don’t understand the human crutches
you don’t share the typical human needs
you don’t need to be told what is holy
you don’t need to be told what to believe
you don’t need to fit in with the masses
you don’t care about popularity
you don’t need to follow the ways of the crowd
and you don’t need to follow me

but you want someone just as independent
just as strong and secure as you are
you want to share everything completely
that is what you wish on a star
unconditional love unconditional trust
you want to believe true love can be
something we create and can make real
sharing fantasy in reality

is there anybody out there?
you know you’re different
you don’t fit in
and that’s alright
you’re true to yourself
enjoy your reason
and still you dream
and not just at night

what some call enlightened
you just call your way
you enjoy your life
you fulfill your day
you want to share your nights
with someone who’s true
someone who’s different
someone like you

i’m waiting out here
waiting for you

rhymes

some times, i find the words to speak my heart
some times the words will fall into a metered rhyme
then some times, the structure seems to fall apart
cuz i don’t think in structured thoughts or metered time

but i think in rhymes
and i feel in melodies
and i wish for time
to share in harmonies
i feel it is a crime
to live a life unshared
i feel it is a crime
to find that no one cared
cuz nobody knew you
beyond your face and name
nobody understood
your joy or your shame
i feel the saddest thing
this life can be
is a life lived completely
without harmony

what about you?
how do you
set yourself free?

some times i find the words to say what is on my mind
some times the words will tell me what i need to do
then some times, clarity is so hard to find
i wonder if this ever happens to you

is this just the way
a writer goes through life
expressing everything
from peak pleasure to strife
in words that flow
without a conscious plan
or is this just the way
of this one honest man
is this just my way
to try to understand
what is going on
and what might be planned

I want to know
what do you
understand?

i think in rhymes
and i feel in melodies
and i wish for time
to share in harmonies
i feel it is a crime
to live a life unshared
i feel it is a crime
to find that no one cared
cuz nobody knew you
beyond your face and name
nobody understood
your joy or your shame
i feel the saddest thing
this life can be
is a life lived completely
without harmony

what about you?
how do you
set yourself free?

is this just the way
a writer tries to share
expressing everything
hoping someone will care
in words that flow (like this)
without a conscious plan
or is this just the way
of this one honest man
is this just my way
of reaching out my hand
is this just my way
to find my own band

what about you?
what about me?
what about us?

is this just my way
to reach for wonderland?
i don’t want to be
a one man band

i think in rhymes
and i feel in melodies
and i wish for time
to share in harmonies
i feel it is a crime
to live a life unshared
i feel it is a crime
to find that no one cared
cuz nobody knew you
beyond your face and name
nobody understood
your passion or your pain
i feel the saddest thing
this life can be
is a life lived lonely
without harmony

i think in rhymes
and i feel in melodies
and i hope to find
someone to share with me
a whole life time
living in harmonies
in heart and mind
in complete honesty
this is why i am here
to find a way to share
this is why i am here
to show i care
this is one way i try
to hope true love finds me
to share the highest high
to set myself free

what about you?
how do you
set yourself free?

how do you share yourself?
how do you find your honesty?

what about you?
how do you
set yourself free?

who is my friend

who’ll care for me
when i lay down
when i am tired
or sick or weak

who’ll carry me
when i lay dying
when i am old
when i can’t speak

who’ll speak for me
when i no longer
have a live voice
when i am gone

who’ll care for me
in the last days
who really stays
to carry on

who’ll dream with me
in the final hours
who’ll be with me
up to the end

who’ll care for me
who is my friend
who’ll care for me
who is my friend

discomfort

there is massive (pun intended) discomfort in the body these days and that brings me to wonder why i am even socializing if i am in no mood to share the body (cuz it’s not all about the sex?... or even the physical comfort?... so why are we alive then?... well, hopefully cuz we want to be and we want to enjoy the experience of being here… and the sex, nothing wrong with sex, as long as it’s mutually comfortable… ah, long live the sense of humor cuz it’s something the only sense i’ve got left)… another step closer, perhaps...

so if you want to be with me, you’ll need patience, a whole lot of patience… and the time to sit and watch, to sit and talk, to sit and listen, to sit and be… and walk and lay and run and float and hug for a long long time… for i seek gentleness and innocence and almost most of all, patience and understanding… if you want to be with me, you’ll need to sleep with me first and i mean sleep… for i seek someone who fits in the pauses, the time outs, the silences, the depths where the secret dreams live… for i seek most of all, the stillness in moments between the heartbeats, were we share uninhibited unconditional love and trust…

these are the days of my self-imposed discomfort and it is a test… a test of will, a test of strength, and test of belief… for in you want to be with me you’ll have faith in me, believe in me, and see beyond the fool pushing the limits of life itself in this body and past the aging uncomfortable physical shell into the me living inside… find comfort in this, even amidst discomfort, that will inspire me to bring the great experiment of overindulgence and typical human frailty to an end and slowly one morning we will wake up to find the comfort once again… and then, if passion comes, we will roll with the flow...

still want to be with me?

song for amy (where nobody else goes)

so tell me about yourself
what makes you who you are
what secrets does your heart whisper
when you wish upon a star?

i want to know the stuff
that everybody knows
but true friends take me to
where nobody else goes

and i sense you could be
important to me
so tell me about yourself
if you feel similarly

and if you just want to be friends who wave
a smiling passing hello
we can enjoy each other’s company
and hug when it’s time to go

i’m not asking for anything
that you don’t want to give
but true friends take me to
where i want to live

sharing caring making love
is what makes me who i am
i live to find my soul mate
i hope you understand

i want to know the things
that everybody knows
but i live to find my
true friend
i wonder if it shows

i live to share the place inside
where nobody else goes

so tell me about yourself
what makes you who you are
what secrets does your heart whisper
when you wish upon a star?

i want to know the stuff
that everybody knows
but true friends take me to
where nobody else goes

these words

this is what i do
when i am alone

i'd rather be sharing
i'd rather be holding someone's hand
i'd rather be kissing
i'd rather be making love

i'd rather be caring for someone
who is caring for me
living in the physical world
being all i can be

and sharing it all
with someone sharing it all
with me

but this is what i do
when i am alone

i dream of sharing in the words i write
i dream of loving all through the night
i dream of caring in the physical world
with someone who's arms would unfurl
and wrap around me, and they would feel
everything in me that is real
and i would feel
another person just as real

but when i am alone
this is what i do
it keeps me from feeling too lonely
or getting too lost in the blues
when i am alone
this is what i do
i dream in these words
i write to you

sleep is for the ones who can
this is what i do
i dream in these words
i write to you

a child

i am a child
please lock me away
and throw away the key
if i can not be what i am
if i must be what you want me to be
just put me on a shelf
i'll weave baskets or pottery
if i can't be myself

i am a child
please try to understand
i do not want your rules
or the back of your hand
if i must jump when you say jump
just send me to my room
i'll live in my own fantasies
rather than your world of doom and gloom

i am a child
i am not afraid of you
you can fuck me or kill me
the worst you can do
but nothing you do will change me
put that on my tombstone
the fears and corruption you live
you can keep for your own

i am a child
i mean no harm
you can not take my innocence
you can not take my charm
my magic is believing in
the wonders of being alive
and no matter what you do
my dreams will survive

i am a child
we're always being born
you may be afraid of us
or you may simply mourn
the loss of your childhhood
you're caving into fear
you can make your choice, but not mine
can i make it more clear

i am a child
i will keep coming back
to remind you of your mistakes
and of the strength you lack
you can sell your idealism
you can condemn your soul
but you can not stop me from playing
out my destined role

i am a child
the martyr on your cross
the one burned at the stake
i represent your loss

i am a child
the hope for tomorrow
the pain of facing truth
the end of your sorrow

if you will stop trying to own me
and stop living in fear
and let a child lead you
you will become aware

i am a child
you are a child
i am a child
you are a child
i am your child
you are my child
i am my child
you are your child
i am a child
i am a child
i am a child
your turn...

from a love

we come from a different time
when love was as simple as sleeping together
body contact with an innocent touch
and if it felt good even better

we come from a different place
where love is as honest as holding each other
feel our heartbeats and breathing as one
being with trust in each other

all the rules and judgments
humans seem to need
all the fear and labels
that make people bleed
all the divisions that
keep people apart
all the confusion that leave
people broken hearted
we started sharing love
before all that started

we come from a different mind
where love does not need to be figured out
or explained or justified
just shared without fear or doubt

we come from a different heart
where love does not need public approval
where love does not need to be defended
where love does not need to be pretended

where love does not need validation
where love does not mean separation
where love does not mean putting others down
where love does not mean dividing a town

where love does not mean condemning anyone
where love does not come at the point of a gun
where love does not wait for after we die
where love does not teach us how to lie

where love does not wait for a certain age
where love does not bleed on history's page
where love does not demand conformity
where love is alive and real and free

we come from a love that some people pray for
we come from a love with no wall or door
we come from a love people say they want to find
a love they once knew but all left behind

all the rules and judgments
humans seem to need
all the fear and labels
that make people bleed
all the divisions that
keep people apart
all the confusion that leave
people broken hearted
we started sharing love
before all that started

mutual fantasy

play with me, little girl
i won't touch you if you don't want me to
just play with me, little girl
i just want to have fun, don't you?

let the walls come tumbling down
and laugh at fear cuz there's not harm in me
play with me, little girl
let's find a mutual fantasy

inside of me is a child of four
and an infant wanting only to be held
most of me is ready to have fun
deep in my heart i want to start a meld

sharing everything the way only is done
in infancy and with the one the one
the one who understands and shares it all
because we mean no harm and hear the call

of the child inside
when someone really cared
wow, wouldn't that be sweet
if someone really cared

sitting here alone
dreaming of sharing
sitting here with me
dreaming of carinf

what if i cared about you
what if you cared about me
what if we made it real
physically
sensually
playfully

play with me, little girl
i won't do anything you say no to
just play with me, little girl
i just want to have fun, don't you?

yes little girl
strange as it seems
i have the control
to help make your dreams
come true
for you
and if you see
that is the dream in me
to share the dream in you
cuz that is what i dream about too

in the child inside
when somebody really cared
wow, wouldn't that be wild
if somebody really cared

all the lonely people
who puts them to bed?
all the sleeping dreams
in each and every head
who really cares about them
who really shares?
did you ever feel it
when somebody cares?

let the walls come tumbling down
and laugh at fear cuz there's not harm in me
play with me, little girl
let's find a mutual fantasy

play with me, little girl
i won't do anything you say no to
just play with me, little girl
i just want to have fun, don't you?

with the child inside
be the child inside
cuz the child inside
knows when somebody really cares
and wouldn't that be a dream
somebody really cares

little boys want to have fun too